Look at these Preposterously Long Videogame Titles!

They always say that the best way to title something is to follow three rules: 1) Short. The most memorable titles are usually on the shorter side. 2) Evocative. Best-selling titles are often evocative and contain compelling wordplay and imagery. 3) Memorable and unique. A good-book-title should be both memorable and unique. Now take those instructions and throw it away apparently because NONE of the games on this list have titles that are anything other than a huge mess of word salad. How any of these can be remembered is beyond me!

Dexterion, The Ultimate Annihilator of the evil dominion: Under Cyborg Demon’s Armageddon Battle – Fate of the cryptic world in cybernetic trooper’s hands, achieved


Summertime High School: A Young Man’s Notes—How a New Exchange Student Like Myself Ran Into His Childhood Friend on the School Tour, Then for Some Reason Became Super-Popular with the Girls for His Daily Scoops on the School Photography Club Even Though He Only Takes Panty Shots, and What He Thinks as He Goes on Dates During His Summer of Island School Life.


White Princess the second ~ Yappari Itto ni Ittemo Soujyanakutemo OK-na Gotsugou Shugi Gakuen Renai Adventure


Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Summoner: Raidou Kuzunoha vs The Soulless Army


Strong Bad’s Cool Game for Attractive People Episode 5: 8-bit is Enough


The Lord of the Rings: Battle for Middle Earth II: Rise of the Witch King


Holy Invasion of Privacy, Badman! What Did I Do To Deserve This?


Nickelodeon’s The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron Boy Genius: Attack of the Twonkies


Teal Harvest: Terror Beyond the Act or Power of Forming a Mental Image of Something Not Present to the Senses or Never Before Wholly Perceived in Reality.


Where in America is Carmen Sandiego?: The Great Amtrak Train Adventure


Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness, Episode Two


Tohoku Daigaku Mirai-Kagaku-Gijutsu-Kyodo-Kenkyu-Center Kawashima Ryuta Kyoju Kanshu: Motto Nou wo Kitaeru Otona no DS Training


Maritrini, Freelance Monster Slayer en: Las Increibles Vicisitudes de Despertarse Resacosa con Fred en la Cama y Tener que Llegar Mas o Menos Puntual a la Prueba de “Monstruos Vigorosos de Pechos Lustrosos” featuring Los Fratelli


Kids, don’t eat your Halloween candy without having your parents inspect it first because there are SICKOS out there who will put RAZOR BLADES in it and you will CUT YOUR MOUTH and GET A POISONED INFECTION and DIE, all from eating your candy early. So don’t do that.


Tales of Monkey Island Complete Pack: Chapter 4 – The Trial and Execution of Guybrush Threepwood.


Compilation of Final Fantasy VII – Dirge of Cerebus: Lost Episode – Final Fantasy VII

Note: This is a slightly edited version of an article I posted on a now-defunct gaming website called Gamrfeed (in around 2010) that I wrote, as with some of this videogame-related stuff I am posting it again to preserve it. I always figure that some of this could be of some value to my new readers.

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